One thing I know about myself is that I am not a good first responder. I've taken CPR and First Aid training but that doesn't mean that I could actually respond in a real situation. I'm slow to process the events and even slower at knowing what to do. And I'm like that even when the the crisis is hundreds of kilometers away. Tonight I let myself read some of the news reports from La Loche, SK. When I first heard about the incident on Friday, my imaginary protective bubble went up around me and I avoided reading, watching or talking about it until my protective bubble sufficiently numbed me enough to the point where I felt like I could slowly let the details seep in at a controlled pace.
It hurts to think of the La Loche Community School being added to the all too familiar names of Sandy Hook Elementary, Taber, Columbine, Polytechnique,and West Nickel Mines to sadly name only a few. Sadness and anger, grief and fear and all the other emotions come flooding out getting all mixed up during all the what iffing. What if it was me? What if it was my school? What if it was my children?
We practice lock down procedures at our school. As I'm sitting in the corner of my school office, on the floor, in the dark, door locked and students sitting behind me I think of my girls on the other side of the school sitting in their dark, locked classroom behind their teacher. I guard my students as if they were my own and I know my colleagues down the hall are guarding my babies. And as I sit there, planning in my mind what I would do if this was the real thing the feeling is of complete vulnerability to think my only defensive is to stay quiet, stay in front of the students and hope. None of this was in the job description.
Despite these recent events, life continues on as we know it must. As the details seep into our knowledge and we mix them with what we already know, we will work to create improved plans and preventions and to continue to make our True North Strong and Free.
Life continues on...
Thought and Prayers to all.